Fuck... I thought the motels in Melbourne were dingy...
Welcome to Wodonga I guess...
I just viewed my blog on a different screen from the one I've been using previously... and the background looks fucked... so I'll get to that when I'm not paying by the minute...
I was willing to give this town a chance before exherting my usual city < country prejudices... but then we went to play some games at Intencity...
I didn't realised Pacman was still hailed as a great achievment in the video game revolution... and how the fuck can you play air hockey with only one baton?
So it's been 400k so far... another 400 or so tomorrow...
It's time for a pot and a parma...
peeeeeeeesss owt!
Welcome to Wodonga I guess...
I just viewed my blog on a different screen from the one I've been using previously... and the background looks fucked... so I'll get to that when I'm not paying by the minute...
I was willing to give this town a chance before exherting my usual city < country prejudices... but then we went to play some games at Intencity...
I didn't realised Pacman was still hailed as a great achievment in the video game revolution... and how the fuck can you play air hockey with only one baton?
So it's been 400k so far... another 400 or so tomorrow...
It's time for a pot and a parma...
peeeeeeeesss owt!
4 comments:
I woke this morning. Walking through my loungeroom, I notice my sons bedroom door open & sun streaming through the curtains. Thinking to myself how strange this is. I walk into his room. He's not there, the French doors in his room are open. His belongings strewn all over the bed and the floor. Thinking "what the fuck" Walking into the kitchen I look outside. I start to panic. It's not until I walk into the kitchen for the 2nd time that I notice the note. I read most of it my heart literally breaks in 2, my boy where is boy. "Where is my son". My mind is going 100 miles an hour. I wake my daughter I'm to scared to go outside, I don't won't to go out there, please don't make me go out there. He maybe lying outside I don't want to see. His sister has completely lost it I have to keep myself together for her, be strong. That's when we read the last line of his letter. "Keep an eye on my blog" Does this mean he's ok or is it just a smoke screen. Neither of us can be sure. I go outside my throat feels like it has completely closed over. I look in both the cars, the shed, around the property the best I can, I'm a coward and don't won't to face what I might find there. If you had asked me a month ago if I thought my son was capable of taking his own life I would have said no. But now I'm not so sure, he hasn't been himself the past couple of days. My daughter is crying, trying to comfort her something tells me to check my wallet. He's completely cleaned me out. What's really fucked is I'm relieved I know he hasn't hurt himself, preferable that he's robbed me. Now there's a therapy issue. Still not convinced I ring his girlfriend. That's when I realised that this young lady I opened my home to, wanted to love as a daughter because my son asked me to, he loves her so. Didn't give a fucking rats arse about me, my daughters. No emotion no feeling. Did I over react?? You bet your arse I did. Emotionally there's nothing left. I can't cry anymore there are no more tears. How do you mend a broken heart????? You can't. Once it's broken it's truly broken. So I can't think about that. Just won't be reading anymore blogs....maybe 1 day but not now.
So here goes another heart breaking story to add to my mothers life, because God knows she needs more.I woke up this morning having a feeling my mum was upset about something, must just be a daughters instinct I guess. I entered the lounge room to find the kitchen door shut and my mum on the phone,laptop screen up and a sound of a croaky voice. I firstly stood at the door trying to make out if she was ok till my cover was blown, by then I knew sumthing was up. I had a feeling that it had something to do with a "blog" and the only two blogs my mum knows is her sons and his gf. I thought "fukin hell! just give my mum one day to settle down, one fukin day to come to terms that her son has robbed her left her with no money a note and a fukin room full of memories to clean up!" But no...unfortunatley there are some women in this world who never give up no matter who they affect or hurt.At times I wish my mother had never been introduced to this blog craze...it would stop her from reading the emotional bullshit left by a so called Miss X a women who is so unstable so emotionally retarded she claims to take care of her son. HAHA I laugh at such a comment as I read down her blog..now tell me, how can a women who has sat infront of me telling me shes suicidle,is crazy and who tries to enter my mothers house at 5 in the morning calling who ever she can to find out how to get in is capable of looking after any humen being?...As i read on about how my mum is such a terrible mother and maybe it could be her that fukd up her sons head I pause take a drag of my ciggie and for some reason feel quite calm, I noticed everything written by Miss X is just there to make herself feel a lil better, it kind of makes me smile knowing she has to write something so terrible about a women that took her in when she was in need just so she can come to terms that was she has done was wrong. Knowing that many people will read her blog I say read away because un fortunatley i can't write everything that went on with this women so I take another sip of my coffee,sigh and feel sorry that her emotional outlet is to make her "loves" family feel like there responsible. I have never met such a contridiction in my life. To my mum I tell her "anything written by Miss X needs to be taken as a joke" and i will not let a vindictive girl overcome my mother with tears. Miss X was a small herdle in our lives and she will not!!! be inbedded in our minds because I'm sure thats want she wants. For myself I am so glad she has taken off with my brother because seeing my mum the way she was when Miss X was under her roof used to crush me, seeing my mother stand back while X used to abuse the fuk out of her son and make comments about our family ...If thats love well then Fuck me dead I sure dont ever want to be in love.Whatever happens between Miss X and my brother is alright with me, everyone chooses what they want in life and if your choice is to run away steal and leave your family friends behind then good fukin on yas! But DONT YOU DARE KEEPING BRINGING MY MOTHER INTO YOUR LITTLE RUN AWAY TALES. Stop and think is it worth making everyone else's life miserable because thats what im feeling??? No, i hope one day you will notice what a difference u had made in our lives for the bad and i hope my mum will get a genuine apology preferably before all your bullshit causes her a heart attack, much luck to you and my brother..but your cheap comments and lies stop here. Leave whats left of my family alone and i asure you we will do the same gladly. With much much hate and no love B.
So here goes another heart breaking story to add to my mothers life, because God knows she needs more.I woke up this morning having a feeling my mum was upset about something, must just be a daughters instinct I guess. I entered the lounge room to find the kitchen door shut and my mum on the phone,laptop screen up and a sound of a croaky voice. I firstly stood at the door trying to make out if she was ok till my cover was blown, by then I knew sumthing was up. I had a feeling that it had something to do with a "blog" and the only two blogs my mum knows is her sons and his gf. I thought "fukin hell! just give my mum one day to settle down, one fukin day to come to terms that her son has robbed her left her with no money a note and a fukin room full of memories to clean up!" But no...unfortunatley there are some women in this world who never give up no matter who they affect or hurt.At times I wish my mother had never been introduced to this blog craze...it would stop her from reading the emotional bullshit left by a so called Miss X a women who is so unstable so emotionally retarded she claims to take care of her son. HAHA I laugh at such a comment as I read down her blog..now tell me, how can a women who has sat infront of me telling me shes suicidle,is crazy and who tries to enter my mothers house at 5 in the morning calling who ever she can to find out how to get in is capable of looking after any humen being?...As i read on about how my mum is such a terrible mother and maybe it could be her that fukd up her sons head I pause take a drag of my ciggie and for some reason feel quite calm, I noticed everything written by Miss X is just there to make herself feel a lil better, it kind of makes me smile knowing she has to write something so terrible about a women that took her in when she was in need just so she can come to terms that was she has done was wrong. Knowing that many people will read her blog I say read away because un fortunatley i can't write everything that went on with this women so I take another sip of my coffee,sigh and feel sorry that her emotional outlet is to make her "loves" family feel like there responsible. I have never met such a contridiction in my life. To my mum I tell her "anything written by Miss X needs to be taken as a joke" and i will not let a vindictive girl overcome my mother with tears. Miss X was a small herdle in our lives and she will not!!! be inbedded in our minds because I'm sure thats want she wants. For myself I am so glad she has taken off with my brother because seeing my mum the way she was when Miss X was under her roof used to crush me, seeing my mother stand back while X used to abuse the fuk out of her son and make comments about our family ...If thats love well then Fuck me dead I sure dont ever want to be in love.Whatever happens between Miss X and my brother is alright with me, everyone chooses what they want in life and if your choice is to run away steal and leave your family friends behind then good fukin on yas! But DONT YOU DARE KEEPING BRINGING MY MOTHER INTO YOUR LITTLE RUN AWAY TALES. Stop and think is it worth making everyone else's life miserable because thats what im feeling??? No, i hope one day you will notice what a difference u had made in our lives for the bad and i hope my mum will get a genuine apology preferably before all your bullshit causes her a heart attack, much luck to you and my brother..but your cheap comments and lies stop here. Leave whats left of my family alone and i asure you we will do the same gladly. With much much hate and no love B.
sorry guys... i disagree with much of what you said... but each to their own... i intend on repaying what i owe when i'm capable
Post a Comment